Alcoholics Anonymous has been a big part of my life over the last 9 months. I attribute a lot of the success I’ve had so far in sobriety to AA, my sponsor, and the friends I’ve made in the program. I remember walking into that first meeting after rehab, scared, alone, embarrassed, and unsure of what my life would look like going forward.

I love AA. It’s the first place I take people who need help. Frankly, I think all humans should go to AA, regardless of a struggle with alcohol — there’s something mentally healthy about sitting in a room with people who openly admit their struggles in life, which flies in the face of popular culture where we present this fake image of who we are, living out “best life” on social media when we are really dying inside.

My local group is robust with multiple meetings a day, all week, and they are very well attended. There’s a lot of sobriety in the room at any of the meetings and there is never a shortage of people willing to be helpful.

There’s one particular thing I just don’t agree with, and it’s pressure to maintain anonymity at a personal level. I fully understand that many people don’t want to advertise that they go to AA, nor does AA want to ever appear to be self-serving or asking for money, or taking political stands here and there. Those are values that I agree with.

When I reached 6 months of sobriety, I posted a picture of my 6 month chip on social media. I was informed that this is a big “no-no” and frowned upon by the local group that I attend.

I can’t refute any of their reasons for frowning upon that action. They have been doing this much longer than me. I think that my other recovery experiences (therapy, rehab, etc) are consistent conceptually with the concepts around their argument for maintaining anonymity.

HOWEVER…

I’ve shared my story and my experiences on social media. For better or for worse. Just last week a long time, dear friend who I haven’t spoken to in about a year, called me and said, “Hey man, I need help with this drinking thing.”

He called me, because he knew what I had been through. He knew that I had found help and he wanted what I have. The AA book says we only keep it by giving it away.

As stigma around addiction and mental health disorders has decreased significantly in recent years, we see more and more people reaching out for help. It’s clear that the bravery of people that have come and gone before me showed when sharing their stories has had a massive impact on society’s willingness to talk, share, help and heal by reducing stigma.

I share my story publicly for 3 reasons:

I have experienced a reduction in shame when I share my story, and the more often I share it, the better for my mental health.
Others have read my story, and been encouraged to share theirs. This reduces stigma further because more and more people are seeing their friends share their struggles openly.
My story has encouraged people that I haven’t talked to in years, to pick up the phone and call me knowing they can get help.

My copy of the AA Big Book tells me to carry this message of recovery to other alcoholics. My way of doing that, is to hang a shingle out front that says “Hey, if you need help, you can get it over here or you can at least get some encouragement, so come on over.”

Let me be very clear. If I went to jail, lost my job, got flogged by the media, lost my friends, and my money but the story could save someone from going down that path, then my life and everything I’ve endured is more than worth it. The me, I knew, for the 37 years prior, couldn’t have even faked it to say those words, in that order. That change — is one of the many gifts I’ve received from AA, and I just can’t help but share that message.

My name is Stephen Hays, I’m an alcoholic and an addict, and I’m not afraid to tell everyone. You shouldn't be afraid either.

Stephen is a Dallas based venture capitalist focused on the mental health and addiction recovery industry. Feel free to reach out on LinkedIN, Twitter or via whatif.vc

If you are struggling with addiction, please reach out.

Previously, Stephen Hays was the founder and managing partner of Deep Space Ventures, a Dallas based venture capital firm.